Phil, I'm a broken record, I know, lol, Mercury in Virgo conj. Pluto... intense perfectionism. Mine manifest as constant drive to progress, personal evolution. The unexamined life is not worth living., etc.
And like Patty is saying, it stems from early childhood formative coping mechanisms. I cannot change the neglectful parents, but I can take on the brokenness as myself ...because then I stand a chance of fixing it.
(Patty, I have a fantastic Jungian psychotherapist).
I especially loved how you both talked about the missing elements. This is a new way of thinking for me and I'm really enjoying looking at the tarot cards this way. Not only what is represented, but what might be missing as a balance.
Your take on perfectionism resonates with me as well. If there's even a sign of a personal shadow (that I'm not already aware of), I MUST know what it is and I must quickly get to fixing it. My lovely therapist (also practicing depth psychology) always reminds me that I just need to put things down hahaha.
I'm specializing in spiritual and depth psychology so hoping to go down that route as well :) Thank you for your lovely feedback on the post and I'm so glad you enjoyed!
Really glad you enjoyed it! 😊 Thanks, as ever, for stopping by and commenting!
Yes, the upbringing thing is a common theme, I think, with this particular Driver... am with you on that, too!
If you've not looked at the missing elements before, here's a couple of things that are useful to consider... 1. Is the element missing because it is needed? and 2. Is the element missing because there is already too much of it in this situation? Usually, one of these questions will unlock something... 👍🏼 Happy to chat about this, if this doesn't make sense 😊
This is a wonderful post, thank you! It prompted me to take a look at my own perfectionism which I too am recovering from. The Major Arcana Key VII The Chariot and 3 of Cups resonate strongly. They reflect the intrinsic nature of the paradoxical issue - wanting to work all by oneself while needing others to help it progress. Knowing that it will be Watered down but at the same time will be more reflective of what was trying to be done alone. Thank you again! Blessings 🙏✨🕉️🌼🦋
Ah yes, I love how you name that it's a paradoxical issue. Water can seem like a scary element for the perfectionist but it is so needed to bring more clarity and more flow. Thank you for your kind feedback, Tom!
You're welcome, it's a great pist. Water brings it back to the group as opposed to the personal and as a result challenges the sense or need for control. Blessings 🙏✨🕉️
Great analysis, Tom, and I am SO glad you enjoyed it, too! Maybe we should start up a Perfectionists Help Group... if enough of us could agree on how, when and where? What do you think? 😉
Phil and Patty - you are my Soul Cats. This article was awesome and exactly broke down my experiences and feelings as a perfectionist.
Page Wands > Four Pentacles > Ten Swords + a reminder to use Three Cups.
I think perfectionists are naturally very task oriented and they start on an enthusiastic high. I sometimes get so high on enthusiasm in my out loud creative brainstorming that my colleagues and bosses get scared! (I’ll raise your Page and give you a Knight).
Then you get to the task itself and you’re either Four of Pentacles (my precious) or Four of Cups (how the hell am I going to pull this off, I can’t even start). Then you have to use that pentacle energy to double down and get stuck into it until you reach that Eight of Pentacles sweet spot, managing the anxiety all the way. Till you finish in an exhausted but half thrilled Ten of Swords mess.
Gotta love the creative process!!!
Still, I learned long ago to try for that golden mean called good enough. Practically speaking though that’s almost impossible.
But I do really appreciate the lessons of the Three of Cups. As a supervising editor I have to keep remembering that it’s more important to care and nurture your team than die in a ditch over every error. Forgiveness and camaraderie is the balm that saves us all from perfect.
I love this... "I’ll raise your Page and give you a Knight" 😃
Yeah, love the 'precioussssss' reference, too, which is SO true for me as well 😂
I strive for 'good enough', because I've been told that's the best way to manage perfectionism... so, now... when it gets to perfect, that's good enough 😉
Thanks so much for this comment, you are clearly in a similar place to me, and possibly not as evolved (on this issue) as Patty... perhaps one day <sigh>... In the meantime... at least we have somewhere to develop to... whereas, some people are just too clever, and have nothing left to aspire to!!! 😄
“Finding a supportive community has been foundational for me and my answer to embracing ‘good enough’. I can more easily let my guard down and know that I will be seen for who I am, and not for who I think I need to be.”
Loved this post Patty and Phil! I’m also a recovering perfectionist and could really relate to the resistance to letting FLOW in! That line above about community especially stuck with me 🥲
Thanks very much for reading, and commenting, Melina. I'm glad you enjoyed this post, and it's good to read that you are a recovering perfectionist, too 🙏🏼😊🕯️
Perfectionism, unmasked by Tarot like a telenovela villain – drama, control, collapse – and somehow still hilarious. Phil and Patty, sharper than swords and twice as charming.
Love Patty and loved this read!
Aaaaah thank you Kate 🥹!! I so appreciate you reading and restacking! Sending you much love 💕💕
For starters, hello to my fellow Angelino, Patty!
Phil, I'm a broken record, I know, lol, Mercury in Virgo conj. Pluto... intense perfectionism. Mine manifest as constant drive to progress, personal evolution. The unexamined life is not worth living., etc.
And like Patty is saying, it stems from early childhood formative coping mechanisms. I cannot change the neglectful parents, but I can take on the brokenness as myself ...because then I stand a chance of fixing it.
(Patty, I have a fantastic Jungian psychotherapist).
I especially loved how you both talked about the missing elements. This is a new way of thinking for me and I'm really enjoying looking at the tarot cards this way. Not only what is represented, but what might be missing as a balance.
Enjoyable read!
Hi Leo! Lovely to meet a fellow Angelino here!
Your take on perfectionism resonates with me as well. If there's even a sign of a personal shadow (that I'm not already aware of), I MUST know what it is and I must quickly get to fixing it. My lovely therapist (also practicing depth psychology) always reminds me that I just need to put things down hahaha.
I'm specializing in spiritual and depth psychology so hoping to go down that route as well :) Thank you for your lovely feedback on the post and I'm so glad you enjoyed!
Really glad you enjoyed it! 😊 Thanks, as ever, for stopping by and commenting!
Yes, the upbringing thing is a common theme, I think, with this particular Driver... am with you on that, too!
If you've not looked at the missing elements before, here's a couple of things that are useful to consider... 1. Is the element missing because it is needed? and 2. Is the element missing because there is already too much of it in this situation? Usually, one of these questions will unlock something... 👍🏼 Happy to chat about this, if this doesn't make sense 😊
Makes total sense, that's exactly where my analytical mind goes!
This is a wonderful post, thank you! It prompted me to take a look at my own perfectionism which I too am recovering from. The Major Arcana Key VII The Chariot and 3 of Cups resonate strongly. They reflect the intrinsic nature of the paradoxical issue - wanting to work all by oneself while needing others to help it progress. Knowing that it will be Watered down but at the same time will be more reflective of what was trying to be done alone. Thank you again! Blessings 🙏✨🕉️🌼🦋
Ah yes, I love how you name that it's a paradoxical issue. Water can seem like a scary element for the perfectionist but it is so needed to bring more clarity and more flow. Thank you for your kind feedback, Tom!
You're welcome, it's a great pist. Water brings it back to the group as opposed to the personal and as a result challenges the sense or need for control. Blessings 🙏✨🕉️
Apologies - that is, as I think you may have guessed, was supposed to be Post - sorry again! ✨✨🕉️
Hehehe… it made me smile! 😊
Great analysis, Tom, and I am SO glad you enjoyed it, too! Maybe we should start up a Perfectionists Help Group... if enough of us could agree on how, when and where? What do you think? 😉
Phil and Patty - you are my Soul Cats. This article was awesome and exactly broke down my experiences and feelings as a perfectionist.
Page Wands > Four Pentacles > Ten Swords + a reminder to use Three Cups.
I think perfectionists are naturally very task oriented and they start on an enthusiastic high. I sometimes get so high on enthusiasm in my out loud creative brainstorming that my colleagues and bosses get scared! (I’ll raise your Page and give you a Knight).
Then you get to the task itself and you’re either Four of Pentacles (my precious) or Four of Cups (how the hell am I going to pull this off, I can’t even start). Then you have to use that pentacle energy to double down and get stuck into it until you reach that Eight of Pentacles sweet spot, managing the anxiety all the way. Till you finish in an exhausted but half thrilled Ten of Swords mess.
Gotta love the creative process!!!
Still, I learned long ago to try for that golden mean called good enough. Practically speaking though that’s almost impossible.
But I do really appreciate the lessons of the Three of Cups. As a supervising editor I have to keep remembering that it’s more important to care and nurture your team than die in a ditch over every error. Forgiveness and camaraderie is the balm that saves us all from perfect.
I love this... "I’ll raise your Page and give you a Knight" 😃
Yeah, love the 'precioussssss' reference, too, which is SO true for me as well 😂
I strive for 'good enough', because I've been told that's the best way to manage perfectionism... so, now... when it gets to perfect, that's good enough 😉
Thanks so much for this comment, you are clearly in a similar place to me, and possibly not as evolved (on this issue) as Patty... perhaps one day <sigh>... In the meantime... at least we have somewhere to develop to... whereas, some people are just too clever, and have nothing left to aspire to!!! 😄
haha not as evolved, I wish 😂! I say I’m recovering but it’s such a constant battle 😮💨🙈
Yeah I always say I don’t need things done to 100% - 98% is fine :) gotta be realistic.
Absolutely! There-s no point in setting impossible standards, is there? 😉
“Finding a supportive community has been foundational for me and my answer to embracing ‘good enough’. I can more easily let my guard down and know that I will be seen for who I am, and not for who I think I need to be.”
Loved this post Patty and Phil! I’m also a recovering perfectionist and could really relate to the resistance to letting FLOW in! That line above about community especially stuck with me 🥲
Thanks very much for reading, and commenting, Melina. I'm glad you enjoyed this post, and it's good to read that you are a recovering perfectionist, too 🙏🏼😊🕯️
Ahhh thank you for reading Melina 😍!! The flow feels so hard at times ~ I love hearing what resonates!
What a fun collaboration, I love it! Very well put together. And Patty, I totally get it on the “recovering perfectionist” thing. Great job! 👏
Thank you, Hannah! Appreciate your feedback!! 🙏🏼
Perfectionism, unmasked by Tarot like a telenovela villain – drama, control, collapse – and somehow still hilarious. Phil and Patty, sharper than swords and twice as charming.
Thank you so much for your kind words, Dea!! I sure love it when the cards call me out haaaaard hahaha.
Thanks Dea 🙏🏼
Seriously, when I pulled those cards, I really did laugh out loud... Tarot knows its stuff doesn't it? 🤣
Love your comments, thanks for reading and commenting 🙏🏼😊
Sooo many memories of you being a perfectionist at Uni Phil... Best not get started on any stories! Snigger... 🤭
Moi? Really??? Never!
Incidentally, you've misspelled perfectionist above... 🤣😂🤣